I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
