He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
