Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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