He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
