I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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