Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
