I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
As shirtless as possible
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize