Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
