): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
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