You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize