Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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