so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
