11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize