He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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