He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
