i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
