Sponge bath it is.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Randomize