I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize
