Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
