Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
