a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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