Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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