I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
