How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
