Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
