You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
