OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize