i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
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