No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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