yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize