For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Houston, we have a squirter
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize