I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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