Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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