Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize