Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
