her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
