I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
