He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
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