She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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