you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
