I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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