May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
