I wish I could teleport
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
