And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
