it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
