S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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