so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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