she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
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