he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
time to smoke my breakfast
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
