ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize