My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
